Monday, February 11, 2013


                               AM I SAFE?

I am a nineteen year old college student from Pune. This is one question I keep asking myself these days......AM I SAFE ?
  I am sure all of you have come across many articles post the Delhi Gang Rape Incident. Well, this is by a little disturbed girl asking the society a question.
 India has a female population of about 48.37% according to a World Bank Report published in 2012 which means 48.37% of the total population of India can be subjected to rape since rape does not have an age barrier. From a one year old baby girl to a 90 year old woman, rape is a phenomenon for which age is not even a question to be put forth. As a young girl I have always wondered why my parents, relatives, friends, in fact everyone around me always keep telling me to be careful. WHY ? The question that keeps popping in my mind... .WHY ? BECAUSE I AM A GIRL? Why is my brother never told to be careful when he gets out in the evening? God Damn it don't tell me it is coz he has a p****.Sometimes I wonder is it the p**** that rules the world coz a guy can get out any time he wants while a girl needs to be careful because unknown people can snatch you, take you to some haunted place and do whatever shit they want with you. I am not being one-sided since I am a girl, I do know that there are boys who get sexually harassed as well, but I am talking about the majority here.
We all have been busy discussing about what sort of punishment should be given to the accused in a case of rape. Have we all wondered why does this happen? GREED FOR SEX?
 Well, I do agree sex does become necessary after a particular age. Once one's secondary sexual characteristics are developed, once your sexual hormones are in a good flow, the drive for sex is quite common in every youngster. The anxiousness to know what it is all about starts at teenage itself which is why our teachers provide us sex education in high school. And then a fraction of the population. Well I must say a majority of the population these days gets ready for practical experience. I have personally seen a lot of youngsters around me who get engaged in sex at a very young age. Gone are the days when sex was a myth that came alive only within the bond of marriage. We all know the various sets of people around us who have sex for pleasure. Consented sex as one calls it is not a harmful or painful procedure; in fact, people enjoy indulging in such a process. Rape is the painful sort of sex also known as dry sex. I once read somewhere lack of foreplay is something like going down a water slide without any water, it is rough, dry and more-over you just turn immobile. That is exactly what rape is. There is no love-making or making out, it is just a mad man or some mad men what you can see in your eyes and all they want to do is put their thing into you, enjoy as they see you scream aloud in pain. You are not mentally or physically prepared for this but there you lie without being able to do anything...helpless. Even a martial arts champion would lie there defenseless as nothing comes on her is just blank due to shock. I recently saw certain pictures exhibiting tactics to deal with a rapist, I wonder how many of us would bother to remember all that when we have to face a real rapist. Another reason what most people point out today is the provocative clothing of women. Well many of those women who say they believe in feminism would want to shush this by saying ''Oh C'mon, Women do have the right to dress up the way they want, tell your sons to control themselves'' .Well even I am a feminist, i.e., a person who believes in equal rights for men and women. But personally, I do not support such women who are of this viewpoint. I once remember seeing a woman on the streets of Pune wearing a Saree exposing most of her navel and a blouse that just had strings behind. I noticed that every single man on that road kept staring at her in a dirty way. You sport a miniskirt, a strapless tight tee and expect a man not to stare at you, well, I really do not know what to say then. Clothing if presented modestly is definitely a beauty. You can drape a Saree neatly without exposing anything or you can wear it in the most obscene way. You can wear a jeans and a loose tea in a nice way or u may pair a tight tee and a damn skinny jean so that your shape is clearly visible to the public. I am not saying that clothing is the only reason such things happen...but it definitely is an undeniable factor. I would rather sport a loose tee than wearing a tight tee to get stared at and arouse harmful desires in men. Directly of course you are not exposing anything but indirectly you are giving a view into the shape of your body. To all those women who wear such clothes and tell men to control themselves..please for heaven's sake understand that female sexuality differs from men sexuality.
 Another cause of concern is the influence of drugs and alcohol. In most rape cases, the accused is seen to have a history of addiction to any of the two. We belong to a generation where men and women are equally exposed to such evils. We have loads of re-habs (rehabilitation centres),awareness drives etc .......still these evils prevail in our society. These things which make people lose their senses, a situation in which you cannot even recognise your own mother or sister. Some people say banning it completely will force people to run behind it illegally which creates further all depends on one's personal know it harms why take it?
 I just got to know the girl passed away. Yes after all those cries and prayers, she finally succumbed. Well I would rather like to put it this way, she has got into a better world devoid of heartless rapists. A phenomenon that I observed on social networking sites were people putting black dots of shame. I wonder how long will this remain. Someday, people will change back to their own pictures. Instead of putting a black dot of shame, i wish these people could do something real against this. After the Delhi Gang Rape case, on the same day as well as the following days more rape cases were reported...YES,IT STILL CONTINUES !

 I felt happy when I saw some guys who pledged to make a change in their attitude. I recently saw one of my senior who posted that he would begin by giving way while driving to girls and women.. Yes this is the way to deal with it......Small, Small steps to tackle a big issue. Every small action counts. If every male started thinking so, do their bit to show respect towards women, I am sure it would definitely make a change. I definitely support that a strong punishment will actually put an end to such malpractices as people would be more scared to commit any crime. But how many of us can guarantee that a penectomy as a punishment for rape would be legalised. We are not sitting at the head of any legal institution, we are all just common people who are praying for a change in the society. There is no use blaming a society of which even we are a part of. Instead do your bit, even if it is a small contribution to pave a way for a better future.
 I was extremely happy to see the large crowds at India Gate and various other places expressing their anger against the incident. It is our right to fight for a safe survival in our own nation. It was unfortunate to see the lathi charge that followed it. WHAT DID WE DO? WE ONLY DEMANDED FOR OUR RIGHT TO LIVE SAFELY? IS THAT A CRIME? We live in a society where updating a status on a social networking site could end you up in prison. What is studied during my schooldays was that our Constitution provides us the freedom of speech and expression. Is that why all this is happening?
WE EXPRESS,WE REVOLT,WE END UP BEING THE CULPRIT ! She was not my sister, she was not my friend, I did not even know her but I cried for her not just me, a nation as a whole did. I wondered how much she would have gone through just because she was a girl. She was truly a brave heart not just her but every female who goes through such horrible experiences. I feel proud to see all those women who live past the trauma caused by such an incident. I totally respect Madam Sunita Krishnan who was gang raped by 8 men at a tender age of 15.Today she is 40, she runs Prajwala, an anti sex trafficking initiative and has saved many girls. I remember watching one of her video in which she says the trauma she went through made her angry, sad, she wanted to fight back, she didn't anyone else to go through the same and hence Prajwala was born..WHAT A WOMAN! Sunita Krishnan is just one name, we do not know how many other woman who fought the trauma bravely. I sincerely pray that every girl who goes through/has gone through any such crime is able to come back, come back as a stronger person.
 Now,to the question....! AM I SAFE? I guess I know very well by now that I am not safe. If it happened to a girl yesterday, it could happen to me today, tomorrow it could be some other girl. All we can do is pray that no such mishap should occur again. Big changes do not happen overnight...We cannot dream of a society that is rape-free by tomorrow but we could definitely hope for a society that has lesser rapes. After all Security comes above anything else.
 I hereby represent the voice of the female population as a whole. To all the authorities that govern us who haven't even come up with a strict punishment for rape, all I am asking is my right to live without any fear. A message to all the psycho rapists out there, the v***** that you want to mutilate is the same place you came from.
 Sincerely, A Girl

 By-- Lulu Rasheed

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